Just Scribbles: On “500 Days of Summer”

500 days


I’ve always thought  500 Days of Summer  was too overrated. I watched it maybe twice before and I never really liked it that much. I mean, I didn’t really get why people loved it so much. The last time I watched it was a year or two years ago maybe. I guess, the reason why I didn’t like it was because of Summer. I didn’t like her, or rather, it’s not her but the fact that she never said sorry to Tom.

A few days ago, I saw a post on my feed that caught my attention. I didn’t read the whole article but the title was Why Summer wasn’t a B*tch. The gist of it was that Tom was just too obsessed on making her the one when she wasn’t, and that Summer was just outright clear – right from the start – that she didn’t want to be serious with him. I mean, I get that. I get her. What I didn’t get was how she could just let Tom get hurt that way, without even any sympathy. She had to know how he was feeling, and she should have been a little bit responsible for causing him that hurt – even an explanation alone, without any apology, might have sufficed. I just agreed to disagree.

Anywho, the reason why I re-watched this movie was because I encountered a few meaningful words of wisdom from watching my many doses of K-drama (lol).  This quote is from Strong Woman, Do-bong Soon that I am currently watching right now:

“I understand that emotions are hard to control. However, you can’t let your emotions hurt others for no reason. You have to be considerate… I know that I might be overstepping my boundaries. But, sometimes boundaries must be overlooked to save others from getting hurt.”

The reason behind these words was because Do-bong Soon knew that her friend’s ex-girlfriend liked her brother, who was also the best friend of her friend – and she said that to both of them. I was just nodding to it the whole time to express how much I agree, and that’s when I started streaming 500 Days of Summer; in the middle of the night.

So here I am, writing my thoughts after watching the movie, and you know what? My thoughts changed about the movie. I still do think that Summer should have apologized, or maybe explained earlier, or just tried to explain what she was starting to feel at the time when she started to have mixed emotions. But, I couldn’t blame her because that’s what I should have done if I was her, but I’m not, because she’s Summer (lol). After re-watching it, I just had a grasp of what Summer’s character is, and it was on that last conversation they had at the end that made me understand.

Tom: You should have told me when we were at the – you know, at the wedding – when we were dancing.

Summer: Well, he hadn’t asked me yet.

Tom: But he was in your life.

Summer: Yeah.

Tom: So why’d you dance with me?

Summer: ‘Cause I wanted to.

Tom: You just do what you want, don’t you?

And that’s that. Tom’s “You just do what you want, don’t you?”  It may have been sarcastic or not, but it was the truth, and Summer didn’t deny it. That made me understand that that’s just how Summer is. At the end, she held his hand, which was a gesture I think that meant she was sorry for his mistake and maybe also for her just doing what she wants every time – which was liking him at that time – and that it had caused him hurt.

So to conclude, I think 500 Days of Summer is not that overrated.  Because third time’s a charm – always works on me. Also, with regards to the article that Summer is not a b*tch, well, I think she kind of still is – just a teeny bit (lol). Because for me, every action comes with a responsibility. It’s okay if you know who you are and what you’re doing, but when it comes to relationships: there are two people. Playing with someone’s heart – even unconsciously – is something that you should be careful with. You’d know when you go through all that sh*t that Tom went through in the movie. You’d know when you also had your heart broken like how his did when he found out that Summer just didn’t feel the same way. You’d know when you know. It’s the same with love. It’s the same with life.

The end.

4:21 AM July 9, 2017


Just Scribbles: On Support

I’m in a point right now in my life where I realized that you don’t usually get support from the people who you think are always there for you. It is human nature, I guess, to support things or people that you approve of, encourage, and are proud of. But what I’ve found to be “real” support is acceptance – Accepting what the person can offer in whatever point of his or her life right now, to be happy for them if they are, and to be sad with them if they’re not.

I have always been dependent all my life – for the meantime, it may be a bit more on the emotional side which no one knows because I don’t show it. I’m the youngest of five children and I believe it was already inborn for me to be independent to my family. But, when our father died when I was a mere seventeen year old, I was driven to become independent.

At that age, I gave up a lot in my own way. I learned to differentiate want from need. And because I was blessed enough to have financial aid during my college years, I was able to live in just the amount of allowance they provide. After graduation, I may not have proceeded to Medicine, I coped with that the best that I can. I chose to work even if it wasn’t in my side of profession (I’m a licensed nurse) so that I can learn how to earn my own money. I did my best to at least find a line of job that is in the medical field, and now I find myself in a different city with a job related to healthcare.

I currently have plans just for this year at the moment and I’ll build more on my plans based on what happens this year. Speaking of plans, I may have disappointed a lot of people because of it, not only did I just want to share it to them but also because they asked and I trusted them. But things happen, and I always end up changing my plans. They get disappointed but what they don’t know is that I also get disappointed in myself the most. I hurt myself the most but I have no choice but to deal with it – I have only me.

What I’ve really realized and I don’t seem to understand is how we, people, more often than not, underestimate each other easily. In my case, growing up, I don’t know if I act too strong in other people’s eyes that they take me for granted and not support me when I need them the most – or even when I just wanted a bit of their support. Because like I said, we only support things that we approve of, encourage, or are proud of. But I have come to be blessed with people who support me no matter what, regardless if they approve of it, or want to encourage, or are proud of it. They support me because they know me and accept me for who I am. They support me because they love me. They support me because I, too, support and love them like they do.

It only takes one person, just one person, to love you, accept you, and support you in everything that you do, and everything else will be okay.

“There is someone who is with you, someone who is willing to pick you up, dust you off, kiss you, forgive you, put up with you, wait for you, carry you, love you. So while everything may not be okay, one thing I know is true, you do not have to be alone.”  – Norah, The Beaver (2001)